Overcoming Discouragement

It's hard to imagine a time when Tinuola Sowunmi wasn't an A-List Entrepreneur, but ten years ago he was a frustrated, a little-known entrepreneur who couldn't seem to breakthrough. Despite his prodigious talents and business prowess, as of his 35th birthday Tinuola Sowunmi could claim nothing more notable than a small scale business. Intensely discouraged, he turned to alcohol and quickly developed a dependency on drugs. Within a year, he hit rock bottom. When his wife and seven-year old daughter discovered him passed out on the kitchen floor, there was no denying that he had lost control.
After finding Tinuola Sowunmi unconscious, his wife Folake immediately checked him into a rehabilitation clinic. For the first time, Tinuola was forced to face up to his anger and discouragement, and he began to make gradual life changes. To his credit, he submitted himself to the recovery process, and with the encouragement of his family, friends and well-wishers; he was able to break his addiction. Less than twelve months later, he finally achieved stardom in his entrepreneurship career. From then on, his reputation grew steadily, and his career flourished. Today, he is regarded as one of Oyo’s finest and hardest-working business mogul.
What can we learn from Tinuola Sowunmi’s journey?
No one is immune to discouragement.
Regardless of your personality, potential, or position you will encounter discouragement at some point in life and in other area of your endeavours.
Our response to discouragement holds the key to our future.
I've noted two types of people in the world: Splatters and Bouncers. When splatters hit the bottom they land with their back and stick like glue. No matter what you try to say and do, there's no use trying to pick up a splatter that has fallen flat for they will not respond to the challenge positively. But, bouncers on the other hand, pull themselves together and rebound after hitting the bottom. Give them a little bit of encouragement, and they will ride it back to the top one more time.
Everyone who falters has a choice: are you going to get up or give up? The question is yours to proffer answers to. For, the difference between the Splatters and Bouncers lies in their attitude. I mean their personal perception of life. For, splatters bemoan their fate and blame others for their problems and failures. While bouncers learn fast from their failures and find supporters to help them recover.

                     

Our influence can be pivotal in rescuing others from self-destructive discouragement.

Imagine if Tinuola Sowunmi had not been married or associated with well meaning people (friends and well-wishers). He might never have checked into rehab, he might never have beaten his drug and alcohol excesses, and the world might never have been so rich by his business acumen. Thankfully for Tinuola, he was surrounded by people who loved him and encouraged him as he recovered from substance abuse.
In leadership, inevitably you will cross paths with people that are downtrodden. When you do, your encouragement can be a lifeline to save or lift them from spiraling into self-destructive despair. Here are steps you can apply to counteract discouragement:
1) Guide Them to the Right Perspective

People who are discouraged oftentimes seem to be trapped under a black raincloud or shambles. Everywhere they turn appears to be dark, and they cannot see rays of light anywhere. As a leader, you can point to the positives and help them to keep hope alive. In addition, you can assist the discouraged person in properly interpreting setbacks. Remind them that just because they experienced failure doesn't mean they are a failure.

2) Connect Them to the Right People

You may encounter people whom you have limited ability to encourage because you can't relate to their area of discouragement. For instance, if you've never been in sales, it can be hard to cheer up a dispirited salesperson. However, within your network, you may know someone who has undergone similar frustrations in sales and would be glad to share some encouragement from his or her experience.
Also, the depth of someone's discouragement may necessitate professional assistance. In the middle of his alcohol and drug addiction, Tinuola Sowunmi didn't need a pep talk from a buddy as much as he needed medical care and attention from a licensed counselor. Sometimes the best service you can do for someone who has hit rock bottom is to persuade him or her to get help – I mean professional help.
3) Restore Them with the Right Words
Dr. Martin Lloyd Jones, at onetime the greatest heart surgeon in England, says this in his excellent work, Spiritual Depression, its Cause and Cure: and I quote, "Most of your unhappiness in life is due to the fact that you are listening to yourself rather than talking to yourself." Think about it. When you're discouraged, you wake up in the morning and right away, there are streams of thought coming into your mind. You haven't invited them; you didn't ask for them; you are not consciously doing anything to produce them; they just come! They start talking to you.
As a leader, you can help people filter unfounded fears and unwarranted worries from their inner dialogue. After doing so, you have the opportunity to speak affirming and encouraging words that can take the place of negative thoughts. Once people change their thinking, their attitudes and actions eventually follow.
I will like to conclude with this piece, regardless of your personality, potential, or position you will encounter discouragement at some point in life but I charge you to develop and get your mind set and you shall overcome no matter what happened.
You will make IMPACT!!!

Thanks…

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To Your Success Summit,

Prince Ejeh Boniface

Great Impact International

(Executive Director)